Please, Do Not Draw This Turtle
“Do you like to draw? Or paint? Or maybe just sketch and doodle?” I must have heard this line a hundred times as a kid, whiling away my summer Saturday afternoons watching old movies on TV. It was delivered by a pleasant-looking man with gray hair in a suit hawking a “free art test” over…
I Covered My Entire Body in Gamer Goo
This piece was originally published at Fanbyte in May 2019. I remember exactly where I was when I first heard about Gamer Goo. I was at home, tweeting about Gamer Goo. The jokes soon dried up like so much Goo in a Gamer’s hand. But unbeknownst to me, Gamer Goo quietly persisted, partnering with big names…
The One Who Returned
When I was just thirteen years old I discovered the terrible injustice at the center of my community. On that day I could no longer enjoy the tranquil fields or pleasant weather of the place of my birth. I walked through the beautiful gates with nothing but the following: BackpackCloth clothing (no armor protection)Length of…
Scramp
After they legalized all drugs in the United States, a handful of men became very, very rich. Nobody really inquired as to whether they’d been able to corner the market as a result of a head start they’d had running the illicit market, and the remnants of the federal government had essentially abdicated governing to…
The Line
The Holy Vessel of the Security Forces of The Line, christened Inevitably Successful in All Circumstances, cut through space and time, arriving in the Real just outside orbit of agri-world 3B-L02. The world’s planetary overseers had complained for months of pirates intercepting shipments of foodstuffs as they were being prepared for shipment from the orbital…
Raymond’s Women
Raymond was dead. There was no mistaking it — his frail form laid motionless atop his bed in the dark, a hardcover book spine up across his chest. As she waited motionless on the couch in the dim lamplight, Lisa wondered if she’d ever be able to get the image out of her head. She’d…
The Dragon
I remember how excited I was for the launch of Reverie Moon Online. My friends and I had read about it in magazines for months, talked about it after school while trading Pokemon cards. It was like nothing I’d ever seen before — a 3D roleplaying game that let players cooperate with strangers around the…
Yet More Press for LAN Party
032c covered LAN Party last year and I forgot to mention it until now. Same with this interview I did with the eidolon journal. My bad! More recently, I spoke to Steffi Cao for CNN Style about the book and the culture and aesthetics of the Y2K era. Don’t have a copy of LAN Party…
Larry
It takes a certain kind of temperament to be a bus driver. My uncle told me that. He drove city buses for forty years and during that time he saw some crazy shit. Women going into labor, couples getting into explosive arguments, people pulling knives on each other, the full spectrum of human experience crammed…
Connection
When Facebook and the mass internet started to really take off one of the most interesting things was realizing how widespread and shared personal quirks and behaviors really were. A lot of these came from childhood. Remember that Facebook fan page for “turning the pillow over to the cool side?” Things like that. It was…